Driving nuts!

Elsa Lycias Joel

One of the greatest joys of driving or riding on Indian roads is to psychologically and physically try to figure out what the driver or rider or pedestrian in front, behind or beside is planning to do next. In Incredible democratic India, as its called, we not only enjoy the freedom of thought and speech, but also the freedom to drive the way we want.
S.Khan stands testimony to this fact. Right or left, a forward or reverse, all that counts is our mood, the machine we own and its Horse Power and not the vehicle that's ahead or behind or beside us. The first lesson I learnt on road is not to stop on seeing anything red, lest the one trailing behind will crash into me. Nobody in India, not even the traffic police, expects anybody to stop or even slow down unless and until somebody wants to alight on their own risk.
Thus, amber means get ready, foot on the accelerator and red is a signal to speed away. Traffic lights give me a nightmare because of the 'IFs' and 'BUTs' that speed through my head and heart when I see them change from green to amber to red. The best example of Abilene paradox is seen at Zebra crossings where people collectively decide to cross, many a time along with the intellectually evolved cows and dogs too, when they really don't want to. The second lesson for responsible drivers would be to not mislead pedestrians and condemn them to death at a Zebra crossing by stopping

After analyzing a complex range of road issues armed with data of corruption, roads caving in and even disappearing after a drizzle, NHAI is busy with golden and silver quadrilaterals very well knowing that highways are the place where drivers learn the zigzag with ease.

Chaotic road conditions - a major cause of worry !

Before knowing our culture, we ought to know about share autos on ply. If you had thought share autos share road space with other vehicles, you need to rethink. Share auto drivers seem so enterprising that they have found simple but highly efficient methods to circumvent every other competitor, which is to not use the horn or break.

the vehicle because the other motorists from all directions will just keep moving at breakneck speed. By the way, is there any people's representative who understands that the sidewalk is meant for pedestrians and not hawkers? After analyzing a complex range of road issues armed with data of corruption, roads caving in and even disappearing after a drizzle, NHAI is busy with golden and silver quadrilaterals very well knowing that highways are the place where drivers learn the zigzag with ease.
Heavy vehicle containers and expert drivers on slow race drive in the centre of a four/six lane indicating right and left thereby making sure no vehicle, big or small, costly or cheap, shiny or dusty inch past them sideways. Four heavy vehicles driving parallel isn't a rare sight to see. It teaches highway users the art of being patient no matter whatever the size of temptation is.
The third lesson is to use honks instead of breaks or be prepared to wait at a signal more than you should as traffic signals are places where drivers will deliberate on which road to take. As a result the one on the far right will try his luck turning left and vice versa. Worse, a one way sign is to be understood as "just speed the other way with the headlights on". The fourth lesson is to learn to read minds instead of road rules.
Road accident statistics say that death due to drunk driving is only a mere 1.5%, that is 7,061 out of 4,64,674. Thanks to government run liquor shops, 500 meters away from national and state highways. Is there anybody who understands the logic behind this 500 meters distance theory that would prevent accidents due to drunk driving? Only the government intelligentsia can come up with such reasoning. Many people never tried the meter to kilometer conversion till the TN government permitted liquor shops to operate 100meters away from schools, hospitals, places of religious worship and residential areas! According to a survey by SaveLife Foundation, an independent NGO committed to improving road safety and emergency medical care across India, I out of 2 respondents use a phone while driving, smart or otherwise. The government of India in a 2015 report has revealed that 2270 people were killed in 8359 crashes as a result of mobile phone usage. Road accidents and deaths due to mobile phone distraction come as no surprise given the growth rate of subscribers and whatsapp users.
Driving slow or fast is determined by the speed and frequency of incoming messages and calls. Hence, the fate of any person driving on Indian roads is determined by the whatsapp messages any other driver receives. Should we be still proud of the fact that no driver in any part of the world is as adept as an Indian driver who can change gears, think of nice and easy answers to the one beside, tackle the GPS and whatsapp, all in one go! Recently I overheard a tea shop discussion that these expert drivers are demanding a separate lane.
Whatever, Indians hold the reputation of sticking to the letter of any warning. Catch a driver with a phone to his ear and he proves that he wasn't talking but the person at the other end was. Like none other, many drivers understand "avoid talking on mobile while driving" and hence, only listen. Imagine the extent of damage a warning as deceptive as "Hands free allowed while driving" would cause. Who is more competent, the accused or the officer is for the spectators to decide. Most traffic officers are competent enough to keep the argument going until the spectators pass by and it is then the unexpected happens.
Just as there are no easy rides in journalism there can't be any on Indian roads. Whatever vehicle we own, getting to/ passing through T.Nagar- Chennai or Connaught Place- New Delhi, Crawford market - Mumbai, the park circus 7 point crossing- Kolkata or the 10 odd busy corridors-Bangalore, one needs logistic assistance from the best brains. Ask me and I tell you it's always best to be air dropped, for India's traffic police research over the decades has shown that one of the major reasons for traffic snarl is the traffic on road.
Just visualize a conundrum on Indian roads- A snake trail of ambassador cars with sirens. Such a sight for the patient aam aadmi on an everyday basis as they wait for hours for the cavalcade to pass by! Few others dare to take a diversion at their own risk, drive in all random directions and finally end up watching the cavalcade at the right time, sometimes at a different location. The slow and steady pace of ambassadors leaves anybody with an IQ, a little higher than that of MC Sharma, wonder if the wheel and steering operate in different time zones more suitable for Indian roads.
Especially while driving around traffic choke points in our country with vehicles moving inch by inch, we can even practice some Pranayama techniques to relax our mind, body and soul.

and stopping abruptly then and there, everywhere without any symptom. No one dares to dodge these autos.
If the entire Truth is told and out, we will witness emotional ignitions all around us. In future, those behind the wheels of ambulances, fire engines and police vehicles might be secretly trained in all driving stunts very necessary for Indian roads and mindset, by those who handle share autos adeptly.
As of now the general public seems Before knowing our culture, we ought to know about share autos on ply. If you had thought share autos share road space with other vehicles, you need to rethink. Share auto drivers seem so enterprising that they have found simple but highly efficient methods to circumvent every other competitor, which is to not use the horn or break.
In actuality share auto drivers are trying to prove a point to pizza delivery services by speeding beyond the continuum of physics so thankful that share auto drivers haven't mastered reverse speeding techniques to reach their destination ahead of time. Only one category of drivers who the share autos allow to inch past is the ones with the "L" stickers. Bigger the sticker, greater you are at the receiving end of road courtesy.
With this clue, I end this piece in spite of knowing that brighter lights need to be shed on what's broadly called and covered under "Indian road culture".



		EDITOR'S MAIL MATTERS OF PUBLIC POLICY NIA ACTS LANDMARK VERDICT HISTORIC JUDGEMENT MODINAMA REALPOLITIK ECONOMIC SCENE FRANKLY SPEAKING JAYALALITHAA LEGACY JAYALALITHAA LEGACY CHANDIGARH DIARY AMERICAN DIARY MEDICAL ADVANCEMENT HITS & MISSES CRICKET DIARY BOOK BAZAAR BOOK BAZAAR SIGNS OF THE TIMES MISSING ROAD SENSE YOGA IN DAILY LIFE FILM-MAKING ART OF LIVING Issue:Sep' 2017 Subscribe Now	MISSING ROAD SENSE Driving nuts! Elsa Lycias Joel One of the greatest joys of driving or riding on Indian roads is to psychologically and physically try to figure out what the driver or rider or pedestrian in front, behind or beside is planning to do next. In Incredible democratic India, as its called, we not only enjoy the freedom of thought and speech, but also the freedom to drive the way we want. S.Khan stands testimony to this fact. Right or left, a forward or reverse, all that counts is our mood, the machine we own and its Horse Power and not the vehicle that's ahead or behind or beside us. The first lesson I learnt on road is not to stop on seeing anything red, lest the one trailing behind will crash into me. Nobody in India, not even the traffic police, expects anybody to stop or even slow down unless and until somebody wants to alight on their own risk. Thus, amber means get ready, foot on the accelerator and red is a signal to speed away. Traffic lights give me a nightmare because of the 'IFs' and 'BUTs' that speed through my head and heart when I see them change from green to amber to red. The best example of Abilene paradox is seen at Zebra crossings where people collectively decide to cross, many a time along with the intellectually evolved cows and dogs too, when they really don't want to. The second lesson for responsible drivers would be to not mislead pedestrians and condemn them to death at a Zebra crossing by stopping After analyzing a complex range of road issues armed with data of corruption, roads caving in and even disappearing after a drizzle, NHAI is busy with golden and silver quadrilaterals very well knowing that highways are the place where drivers learn the zigzag with ease. Chaotic road conditions - a major cause of worry ! Before knowing our culture, we ought to know about share autos on ply. If you had thought share autos share road space with other vehicles, you need to rethink. Share auto drivers seem so enterprising that they have found simple but highly efficient methods to circumvent every other competitor, which is to not use the horn or break. the vehicle because the other motorists from all directions will just keep moving at breakneck speed. By the way, is there any people's representative who understands that the sidewalk is meant for pedestrians and not hawkers? After analyzing a complex range of road issues armed with data of corruption, roads caving in and even disappearing after a drizzle, NHAI is busy with golden and silver quadrilaterals very well knowing that highways are the place where drivers learn the zigzag with ease. Heavy vehicle containers and expert drivers on slow race drive in the centre of a four/six lane indicating right and left thereby making sure no vehicle, big or small, costly or cheap, shiny or dusty inch past them sideways. Four heavy vehicles driving parallel isn't a rare sight to see. It teaches highway users the art of being patient no matter whatever the size of temptation is. The third lesson is to use honks instead of breaks or be prepared to wait at a signal more than you should as traffic signals are places where drivers will deliberate on which road to take. As a result the one on the far right will try his luck turning left and vice versa. Worse, a one way sign is to be understood as "just speed the other way with the headlights on". The fourth lesson is to learn to read minds instead of road rules. Road accident statistics say that death due to drunk driving is only a mere 1.5%, that is 7,061 out of 4,64,674. Thanks to government run liquor shops, 500 meters away from national and state highways. Is there anybody who understands the logic behind this 500 meters distance theory that would prevent accidents due to drunk driving? Only the government intelligentsia can come up with such reasoning. Many people never tried the meter to kilometer conversion till the TN government permitted liquor shops to operate 100meters away from schools, hospitals, places of religious worship and residential areas! According to a survey by SaveLife Foundation, an independent NGO committed to improving road safety and emergency medical care across India, I out of 2 respondents use a phone while driving, smart or otherwise. The government of India in a 2015 report has revealed that 2270 people were killed in 8359 crashes as a result of mobile phone usage. Road accidents and deaths due to mobile phone distraction come as no surprise given the growth rate of subscribers and whatsapp users. Driving slow or fast is determined by the speed and frequency of incoming messages and calls. Hence, the fate of any person driving on Indian roads is determined by the whatsapp messages any other driver receives. Should we be still proud of the fact that no driver in any part of the world is as adept as an Indian driver who can change gears, think of nice and easy answers to the one beside, tackle the GPS and whatsapp, all in one go! Recently I overheard a tea shop discussion that these expert drivers are demanding a separate lane. Whatever, Indians hold the reputation of sticking to the letter of any warning. Catch a driver with a phone to his ear and he proves that he wasn't talking but the person at the other end was. Like none other, many drivers understand "avoid talking on mobile while driving" and hence, only listen. Imagine the extent of damage a warning as deceptive as "Hands free allowed while driving" would cause. Who is more competent, the accused or the officer is for the spectators to decide. Most traffic officers are competent enough to keep the argument going until the spectators pass by and it is then the unexpected happens. Just as there are no easy rides in journalism there can't be any on Indian roads. Whatever vehicle we own, getting to/ passing through T.Nagar- Chennai or Connaught Place- New Delhi, Crawford market - Mumbai, the park circus 7 point crossing- Kolkata or the 10 odd busy corridors-Bangalore, one needs logistic assistance from the best brains. Ask me and I tell you it's always best to be air dropped, for India's traffic police research over the decades has shown that one of the major reasons for traffic snarl is the traffic on road. Just visualize a conundrum on Indian roads- A snake trail of ambassador cars with sirens. Such a sight for the patient aam aadmi on an everyday basis as they wait for hours for the cavalcade to pass by! Few others dare to take a diversion at their own risk, drive in all random directions and finally end up watching the cavalcade at the right time, sometimes at a different location. The slow and steady pace of ambassadors leaves anybody with an IQ, a little higher than that of MC Sharma, wonder if the wheel and steering operate in different time zones more suitable for Indian roads. Especially while driving around traffic choke points in our country with vehicles moving inch by inch, we can even practice some Pranayama techniques to relax our mind, body and soul. and stopping abruptly then and there, everywhere without any symptom. No one dares to dodge these autos. If the entire Truth is told and out, we will witness emotional ignitions all around us. In future, those behind the wheels of ambulances, fire engines and police vehicles might be secretly trained in all driving stunts very necessary for Indian roads and mindset, by those who handle share autos adeptly. As of now the general public seems Before knowing our culture, we ought to know about share autos on ply. If you had thought share autos share road space with other vehicles, you need to rethink. Share auto drivers seem so enterprising that they have found simple but highly efficient methods to circumvent every other competitor, which is to not use the horn or break. In actuality share auto drivers are trying to prove a point to pizza delivery services by speeding beyond the continuum of physics so thankful that share auto drivers haven't mastered reverse speeding techniques to reach their destination ahead of time. Only one category of drivers who the share autos allow to inch past is the ones with the "L" stickers. Bigger the sticker, greater you are at the receiving end of road courtesy. With this clue, I end this piece in spite of knowing that brighter lights need to be shed on what's broadly called and covered under "Indian road culture".